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Why? Why was all the chili and cheese from my Frito Chili Pie stuck to the wrapper? Damn you Sonic and your bowl of soggy fritos!
In other news, have decided to go to KS for Easter. Probably on Thursday as I want to be home to watch Survivor and I think I said I'd RP on Wednesday evening. But I'm not sure if I actually said that or if I imagined it in my Frito Chili Pie induced angst.
Talked to Jane't about possibly hangin' with the homies... okay, we discussed the possibility of lunch. Just, you know, FYI - I'm from a small (very small, tiny, minuscule) town in KS. My grandparent's had cows. COWS! The town's idea of cultural diversity was *gasp* a Jewish woman teaching sixth grade. So, yeah, I should really never, ever, ever, ever even attempt to be "with it" or "hip" because these things are not possible where I come from.
And I've lost my fork. Crap.
It's even worse when DH tries to be "down wit that". Seriously. I cringe. A lot.
My sister gets away with it on occasion for two reasons 1) she knows she's being silly and everyone else knows she's being silly and 2) she actually had friends from the Crime Dot (Otherwise known as Wyandot and I mean no disrespect but that is what it is called and I wouldn't want to drive my car through it after dark. Or during the day for that matter. Ever really.) and actually met people who spoke that way.
Where was I? So, yeah, going back to KS for Easter. I'm done with that topic. Let's move on.
In the last few days I have cranked out so many posts (both on board and sort of pre-production for an upcoming event) for my two characters for Afterglow that I should be burnt out. Really. Yet part of me wants to do more, think of new plots, cause mischief, write wild RP smut, and even get another character so I'll have more excuses to do all of the above.
And then the rest of me looks at the other part and bashes it upon the nose with a rolled up newspaper.
Was terribly excited about looking for another character. Had narrowed it down to two choices that I thought were equally cool. And now? Very meh about the whole thing. Not sure if I've just lost interest in the two concepts (which look cool and shiny at first but the longer I examine them the more I find that there doesn't seem to be a lot of substance) or if I've lost interest in the entire idea of another character at all.
Which makes me look at the two I already have. Both were wonderful concepts. Ghostly Moaning Myrtle - undead angst machine whose greatest need was to have someone, anyone like her. Especially if that someone was about so tall with dark hair and green eyes and funny scar on his forehead. And Gilderoy Lockhart - Handsome. Rich. Nutter.
I think I've fleshed them out a bit, given them some life. But have I really? Or are they just one note wonders with pretty faces (and in Myrtle's case, a nice rack)?
I love Myrtle. She's everything I ever even thought back in school when I was positive the world was out to get me. She's nuttier than a fruitcake. But upon looking back, she doesn't really do much on her own. She doesn't act, she reacts. She plays off of others well, I'm willing to concede that some of my favorite bits of writing have come from her.
And then there is Gildy. He has grown since I first introduced him. He started out as a decent enough guy who was a tad bit confused about his past (he believed everything he'd read in his own books) and just didn't understand why he couldn't do some of the things he used to be able to do. And if he couldn't help small villages anymore, than he could help beautify the wizarding world through his line of beauty aids. And gradually I was able to introduce a very slight darker side. Little bits of anger here and there, plotting, schemeing... He's not Evil by any stretch of the imagination. Yet he has the same problem as Myrtle. Everything that he's done since character creation has been in response to someone else.
And therein lies the true problem. Me. Miss Creative Writer, Miss Wannabe Author... freezes up when it comes to thinking of something original. Give me a situation and I can write the heck out of it, or at least give it my best effort. I will get into my character's head and I will BE Myrtle as she wonders why no one ever seems to Love her. I will BE Gilderoy as he convinces himself that Millicent is cheating on him and By Damn He Will Not Be Made A Fool Of. I can pull cute little side bits like Gossipy French Portraits, Pervy Ghosts, or Bi-Sexual Boutique owners out of my head to add flavor.
But since I started playing I've come up with only one story idea for one of my characters and that was when Myrtle "broke up" with Harry. And even that was a natural reaction to her relationship with Harry. Reacting again.
I believe the biggest part of my problem (and yes, it is MY problem, it has nothing to do with any of the other ladies in the RP or their writing) is that I'm too freaking insecure. I'm afraid to suggest something because I don't want to be turned down or worse, have someone who isn't really that enthused about the idea going along with it because they don't want to hurt my feelings. I'd rather just hear that the idea sucks... but I don't want to hear that either, so I refrain from suggesting anything at all.
My insecurity is beating my creativity to a pulp and taking a crap on it. And that sucks. It sucks soggy fritos.
Found my fork.
I need to stop being such a gigantic wuss and come up with some kind of kick ass plot. And then I have to grow the female equivalent of nads and *gasp* approach someone about working with me instead of hanging out in the background hoping to get picked by one of the popular kids for the dodgeball team... erm... sorry, gym class flashback.
Which is all well and good in theory but if I can't bloody well think of something in the first place I'm a bit screwed, aren't I? Which brings me back to where this little Pity Party started.
And finally. DH said he was going to send me a present. Presents are good. I like them as a rule. Specifically, I like the anticipation of getting them, but then I get so excited trying to figure out what it is that actually opening the present is a bit anticlimactic. For me, anyway.
But then, I'm odd.
In other news, have decided to go to KS for Easter. Probably on Thursday as I want to be home to watch Survivor and I think I said I'd RP on Wednesday evening. But I'm not sure if I actually said that or if I imagined it in my Frito Chili Pie induced angst.
Talked to Jane't about possibly hangin' with the homies... okay, we discussed the possibility of lunch. Just, you know, FYI - I'm from a small (very small, tiny, minuscule) town in KS. My grandparent's had cows. COWS! The town's idea of cultural diversity was *gasp* a Jewish woman teaching sixth grade. So, yeah, I should really never, ever, ever, ever even attempt to be "with it" or "hip" because these things are not possible where I come from.
And I've lost my fork. Crap.
It's even worse when DH tries to be "down wit that". Seriously. I cringe. A lot.
My sister gets away with it on occasion for two reasons 1) she knows she's being silly and everyone else knows she's being silly and 2) she actually had friends from the Crime Dot (Otherwise known as Wyandot and I mean no disrespect but that is what it is called and I wouldn't want to drive my car through it after dark. Or during the day for that matter. Ever really.) and actually met people who spoke that way.
Where was I? So, yeah, going back to KS for Easter. I'm done with that topic. Let's move on.
In the last few days I have cranked out so many posts (both on board and sort of pre-production for an upcoming event) for my two characters for Afterglow that I should be burnt out. Really. Yet part of me wants to do more, think of new plots, cause mischief, write wild RP smut, and even get another character so I'll have more excuses to do all of the above.
And then the rest of me looks at the other part and bashes it upon the nose with a rolled up newspaper.
Was terribly excited about looking for another character. Had narrowed it down to two choices that I thought were equally cool. And now? Very meh about the whole thing. Not sure if I've just lost interest in the two concepts (which look cool and shiny at first but the longer I examine them the more I find that there doesn't seem to be a lot of substance) or if I've lost interest in the entire idea of another character at all.
Which makes me look at the two I already have. Both were wonderful concepts. Ghostly Moaning Myrtle - undead angst machine whose greatest need was to have someone, anyone like her. Especially if that someone was about so tall with dark hair and green eyes and funny scar on his forehead. And Gilderoy Lockhart - Handsome. Rich. Nutter.
I think I've fleshed them out a bit, given them some life. But have I really? Or are they just one note wonders with pretty faces (and in Myrtle's case, a nice rack)?
I love Myrtle. She's everything I ever even thought back in school when I was positive the world was out to get me. She's nuttier than a fruitcake. But upon looking back, she doesn't really do much on her own. She doesn't act, she reacts. She plays off of others well, I'm willing to concede that some of my favorite bits of writing have come from her.
And then there is Gildy. He has grown since I first introduced him. He started out as a decent enough guy who was a tad bit confused about his past (he believed everything he'd read in his own books) and just didn't understand why he couldn't do some of the things he used to be able to do. And if he couldn't help small villages anymore, than he could help beautify the wizarding world through his line of beauty aids. And gradually I was able to introduce a very slight darker side. Little bits of anger here and there, plotting, schemeing... He's not Evil by any stretch of the imagination. Yet he has the same problem as Myrtle. Everything that he's done since character creation has been in response to someone else.
And therein lies the true problem. Me. Miss Creative Writer, Miss Wannabe Author... freezes up when it comes to thinking of something original. Give me a situation and I can write the heck out of it, or at least give it my best effort. I will get into my character's head and I will BE Myrtle as she wonders why no one ever seems to Love her. I will BE Gilderoy as he convinces himself that Millicent is cheating on him and By Damn He Will Not Be Made A Fool Of. I can pull cute little side bits like Gossipy French Portraits, Pervy Ghosts, or Bi-Sexual Boutique owners out of my head to add flavor.
But since I started playing I've come up with only one story idea for one of my characters and that was when Myrtle "broke up" with Harry. And even that was a natural reaction to her relationship with Harry. Reacting again.
I believe the biggest part of my problem (and yes, it is MY problem, it has nothing to do with any of the other ladies in the RP or their writing) is that I'm too freaking insecure. I'm afraid to suggest something because I don't want to be turned down or worse, have someone who isn't really that enthused about the idea going along with it because they don't want to hurt my feelings. I'd rather just hear that the idea sucks... but I don't want to hear that either, so I refrain from suggesting anything at all.
My insecurity is beating my creativity to a pulp and taking a crap on it. And that sucks. It sucks soggy fritos.
Found my fork.
I need to stop being such a gigantic wuss and come up with some kind of kick ass plot. And then I have to grow the female equivalent of nads and *gasp* approach someone about working with me instead of hanging out in the background hoping to get picked by one of the popular kids for the dodgeball team... erm... sorry, gym class flashback.
Which is all well and good in theory but if I can't bloody well think of something in the first place I'm a bit screwed, aren't I? Which brings me back to where this little Pity Party started.
And finally. DH said he was going to send me a present. Presents are good. I like them as a rule. Specifically, I like the anticipation of getting them, but then I get so excited trying to figure out what it is that actually opening the present is a bit anticlimactic. For me, anyway.
But then, I'm odd.
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From:
no subject
Until this dragon plot thingy (which actually stemmed from an idea that ash had to have Charlie at Hogwarts, w00t w00t that worked out so well, and Rilla's excellent mind working overtime) I had no plottage and was just stumbling around having lunches and feeling sniffles cause I too wanted to get on the band wagon with the others.
Come up with an idea and approach away doll. I bet you ever last shag Fleur has people WILL NOT shy away. You are an amazing writer and I adore both your characters.
From:
no subject
And again, approach away! Everyone's very receptive, and if it doesn't sound like it'd work I've found that peeps normally talk about how they can *make* it work rather than toss it out altogether. Sometimes it does end up getting tossed out, but I've always seen it at least discussed first.
For the record, I *love* Myrtle and Gildie! You've done a LOT with some very cardboard-ish canon characters while still keeping their canon essences. Brilliant :).