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I'm a planner. I like to have a firm idea of what to expect before I go on trips, I like to have scheduled times, I like to know what I need to have in advance of showing up somewhere. Heck, during the shopping trip to Babies R Us with my parents I had spreadsheets with prices, broken down into subsections of need/want/secondary want so that we could get in and out as quickly as possible and make the most use of my stack of 20% off coupons.
There are some (myself included) who might call me anal retentive, even.
So... I really, really hate feeling like I'm not prepared for something, and I really do not feel prepared to have this baby.
Sure, I've got a few months yet before I probably need to really worry, but I am already getting irritable and panicky and that's... not good for me or the baby or Captain, really, since he's going to be bearing the brunt of Cranky Miahness.
I've got lists everywhere. Lists of things we need. Lists of things we've got. Lists of things we might need. Lists of things we'd want if we were totally rich. Lists of things we could use in the future but don't want to buy ourselves because where would we put it and also who needs a high chair for an infant, but Captain seems to think we might need to have a large item back on the baby registry because he's heard rumblings of asking for an idea for a nice gift from work.
Every list just seems to remind me that I really have no friggin' clue what I'm doing.
None.
I am faking it with the best of my ability, but seriously, you can only learn so much from reading books and forums on the internet, and I thought at first I'd be okay, I had a younger sister, I babysat, surely I can remember how to do some of this stuff... but oh my goodness, no.
Do you have any idea how complicated breastfeeding is? How many parts are required besides just the obvious two?
Don't even get me started on formula feeding, i haven't even looked at that mess yet.
And clothes.
I mean, I get the gist. Naked babies in winter = bad, so clothes = good. But what clothes? Layers? What can he wear in his carseat, versus in his stroller? Are bodysuits and pants and maybe a sweatshirt/sweater ok with a blanket for travel, or do I need more? Is the quilted shower cappy car seat cover I have enough to keep him warm? What about sleeping? Footie PJs with swaddlemes or HALO sleepsacks? Too much? Not enough?
Also, I keep hearing that I should stock up on diapers from one side, but not to stock up too much from the other because you don't know if the kind you get will work for the baby. Same with bottles. You need bottles (assuming you plan to use them, and even if we do get to breast feed exclusively, I'm using bottles because why should I have all the middle of the night feeding fun), but don't buy too many of one kind because they may not work with the baby. Oh, and bottle nipples - so many different kinds. And clothes again - you need some newborn, but the baby may never even fit in the newborn, so have the clothes on hand, but don't open/wash them because you may need to return them and some places have a 90 day return policy so don't buy too early.
So, in short, I'm expected to be prepared for every contingency, which would be workable if I had a clue what even half of those contingencies even were. And I know full well that the moment that kid is born any and all plans I've made will be going out the window because babies to not work with plans. Babies don't even care because babies are like honey badgers.
So. Panicking. Already.
There are some (myself included) who might call me anal retentive, even.
So... I really, really hate feeling like I'm not prepared for something, and I really do not feel prepared to have this baby.
Sure, I've got a few months yet before I probably need to really worry, but I am already getting irritable and panicky and that's... not good for me or the baby or Captain, really, since he's going to be bearing the brunt of Cranky Miahness.
I've got lists everywhere. Lists of things we need. Lists of things we've got. Lists of things we might need. Lists of things we'd want if we were totally rich. Lists of things we could use in the future but don't want to buy ourselves because where would we put it and also who needs a high chair for an infant, but Captain seems to think we might need to have a large item back on the baby registry because he's heard rumblings of asking for an idea for a nice gift from work.
Every list just seems to remind me that I really have no friggin' clue what I'm doing.
None.
I am faking it with the best of my ability, but seriously, you can only learn so much from reading books and forums on the internet, and I thought at first I'd be okay, I had a younger sister, I babysat, surely I can remember how to do some of this stuff... but oh my goodness, no.
Do you have any idea how complicated breastfeeding is? How many parts are required besides just the obvious two?
Don't even get me started on formula feeding, i haven't even looked at that mess yet.
And clothes.
I mean, I get the gist. Naked babies in winter = bad, so clothes = good. But what clothes? Layers? What can he wear in his carseat, versus in his stroller? Are bodysuits and pants and maybe a sweatshirt/sweater ok with a blanket for travel, or do I need more? Is the quilted shower cappy car seat cover I have enough to keep him warm? What about sleeping? Footie PJs with swaddlemes or HALO sleepsacks? Too much? Not enough?
Also, I keep hearing that I should stock up on diapers from one side, but not to stock up too much from the other because you don't know if the kind you get will work for the baby. Same with bottles. You need bottles (assuming you plan to use them, and even if we do get to breast feed exclusively, I'm using bottles because why should I have all the middle of the night feeding fun), but don't buy too many of one kind because they may not work with the baby. Oh, and bottle nipples - so many different kinds. And clothes again - you need some newborn, but the baby may never even fit in the newborn, so have the clothes on hand, but don't open/wash them because you may need to return them and some places have a 90 day return policy so don't buy too early.
So, in short, I'm expected to be prepared for every contingency, which would be workable if I had a clue what even half of those contingencies even were. And I know full well that the moment that kid is born any and all plans I've made will be going out the window because babies to not work with plans. Babies don't even care because babies are like honey badgers.
So. Panicking. Already.
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