Sleep. SLEEP.

[missmiah]

I have been awake for roughly eighty bajillion twenty-four hours. I think.

I was up all Tuesday night - totally ruining all that effort I went to just a week and a half ago to force myself back on a "normal" sleep schedule - because... I forget why I was up all night, actually. I remember watching several hours worth of Project Runway and reading exchange fic and painting my toe nails (dark chocolate brown with chunky sparkly copper glitter) and possibly brewing some potions on Pottermore, but the details are all sort of a blur.

UnInteresting fun fact: I can now recite all the steps for brewing a Sleeping Draught without having to look at my cheat sheet.

After spending yesterday afternoon making lists and looking at Think Geek for Christmas Gift Ideas and adding phone numbers and addresses from the small stack of business cards I've managed to hoard in my wallet into my phone, I thought it might be a good idea to try to catch up on all the exchange entries that posted this week. But first, I sat in the tub and wrote a few pages of my newest WIP-to-be-eventually-abandoned and then shaved my legs.

Which I'm sure all of you really wanted to hear about.

Leg hair is serious business.

Anyway, Captain woke up an hour early and was all "Why aren't you asleep?" and I was all "There are things on the internets and I must READ THEM." and then he shrugged and went to work and I thought about going to bed but then I got sucked into that wank with the Bloggess (so funny) and the PR jerk guy and then Wil Wheaton's two cents on the matter and then some other blogs and then Captain was home again because someone decided they needed to play Army this morning and that involved body armor and he'd left his in the spare room because you don't just leave that shit in the car because people will break into your car and steal that stuff and then sell it for crack donuts (we have Krispy Cremes down here) or something, so he popped in to shower and I told him all about the Bloggess/idiot PR guy wank while he was being all damp and stuff and then he left after making me promise I would go to sleep.

And then he came back ten minutes later because he'd forgotten the body armor, and then he left again for the third time this morning, and I was pretty sure I would go to bed soon, but I just wanted to read one more thing and then it was ten thirty and I was supposed to get up at noon to put a roast in the crock pot and that definitely was NOT going to happen.

Twenty minutes later I finally decided that I couldn't just sit at my desk pretending the crock pot would find itself and wipe itself off and the roast would magically end up in it, and I staggered into the pantry/laundry room/place we store stuff I don't want in the rest of the house but don't want to have to walk all the way to the bottom of the yard and fight with the stupid padlock on the shed to get, and there was my giant dusty crockpot. I added the cup of water, and the slab of meat and then the veggies neither of us will eat and some potatoes and then discovered the little packet of seasoning that I was totally supposed to mix in with the water BEFORE adding all the other stuff.

You know, it just now occurs to me that I probably could have pulled all the bits out and mixed the powder with the water and then put everything back instead of what I actually ended up doing - which was dumping the powder on top of everything, realizing that wouldn't work and then tried to scrap the powder off of the onions and potatoes and meat into the water and stir it up around the sides of the roast with a knife, before finally giving up and sort of sticking my entire hand in the crock pot to smoosh the water around and attempt to drap all the carrots that will just get thrown away later out from under the roast. I don't even know how they got under there in the first place.

And now my hand smells of celery and roast seasoning even though I washed it and I'm too tired to really care.

I don't even remember what I came back in here to write about, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't any of the crap I've already typed.

Screw it, I haven't had caffeine in eight hours and Imma gonna pass out now.

Comments

[beeform]

Okay, I think this is the most hilarious post I'll read today. LOL

Go. To. Bed!

[missmiah.livejournal.com]

I... really don't remember writing most of that? I mean, I remember standing with my hand up to the wrist in slimy meat/veggie/crockpot juice and thinking "That is a brilliant thought, I must write it down to share with others!" or something like that, and then I remember typing words and then there was sleepy times?

But yay for being amusing!

[missmiah.livejournal.com]

PS - my hand still smells vaguely of roasty celery.

[scatteredlogic.livejournal.com]

Anyway, Captain woke up an hour early and was all "Why aren't you asleep?" and I was all "There are things on the internets and I must READ THEM."

~falls over laughing~ Oh, good grief, that explains so very many of my own sleepless nights.

Sweet dreams!

[missmiah.livejournal.com]

There was five hours of sleep (and I'm considering turning around and going right back for more) and I am slightly more coherent, I think?

I really need to go to bed early tonight so I probably should force myself to stay up until at least nine pm because my day starts at five am Saturday and involves setting up someone's flea market stall at buttcrack o'dawn, but... my pillows are so friendly, I can hear them even now, with their siren's song. "Come back to us, Miah. Join us. We will lovingly cradle your head while you dream of Alan Rickman or maybe giant spiders or zombies, but never Rickman AND giant spider zombies because that's really weird."

[kauricat.livejournal.com]

That's how we always do our crock pot roasts! We put in plain water, veggies, and meat, and then we sprinkle dried onion soup mix on top of the meat. When it all heats up the water that condenses and drips back down on the powder and washes it slowly down into the meat and vegetables.

[missmiah.livejournal.com]

This would have been so helpful to know/think of/remember earlier before my hand smelled of roast juice and barfy veggies we won't eat.

Down with soggy carrots/onions/celery! Yay for potatoes and cow!