First things first - I signed up for the sshg_exchange
at the last minute, because I am a sucker and I love me some Exchange gifts (mine, someone else's, whatever I don't care, post a gift, I enjoy). I shamelessly reused most of my prompts from last time because I am lazy, but the new one I spent all day (when I wasn't napping) coming up with amuses me greatly so yay for that. And one of the reused ones has actually sparked a plot bunny of my own, but that one can't be worked on until I finish the Exchange Bingo fic that I owe someone, so I'll have to wait for that.
Secondly, I ended up in the ER Saturday night for baby related issues. One of the perks - you know, other than ending up with a baby at the end, I guess - of pregnancy was the thought that I wouldn't have to deal with menstrual cramps for nine months. Turns out that's not one hundred percent accurate, apparently. See, there is this thing called round-ligament syndrome (or something similar, again, I'm lazy and I don't want to bother looking it up) and that feels almost exactly like... yep, you guessed it, menstrual cramps.
Except that no one really bothers to warn you about that ahead of time. Consider this your early warning potential baby makers on my flist, just a public service announcement from me to you.
Also, cramping in that area is an early warning sign for all sorts of things that are considered Bad during pregnancy, so if you know about the warning signs but aren't terribly aware of what round-ligament syndrome pain is going to feel like and you suddenly develop waves of menstrual cramps that go from mild to OMG SOMEONE HAS PUT MY GIRLY INNARDS IN A CUISINART and then back to mild on and off for three days, you might panic and end up at the ER.
Where the idiots live.
So, I spent three hours there only to end up with a diagnosis of - and I am seriously not making this up, I have the paperwork in front of me and everything - pelvic pain and intrauterine pregnancy. Yes, that's right, three hours after I showed up they discharged me with a diagnosis of "you hurt and also you are pregnant". No explanation for the cramping (which is STILL happening).
ALSO, they insisted I needed an IV (which I agreed was highly probable since even I could tell I was probably dehydrated) but the nurse who first came in to do it did not believe me when I told him I was a difficult stick and that he would probably need a small needle. It was all "Oh, no, Doc wants an IV so I need a bigger needle, I'm good at this, it will be fine." HAHAHA, no. So two attempts from him, including blowing out my one good arm vein, and then he called in the other nurse. She was sweet and nice and blew a vein in my hand, but at least she felt bad about it. She called in the current on call "expert", a very polite and understanding lady who kept trying to make me feel better because I was crying by the time she made attempts four and five (the side of my wrist and then back up to near the blown good vein), and told me how much she appreciated that I wasn't screaming or cursing or trying to hit her by that point (Apparently there are people even worse than me when it comes to IVs, who knew?) before she gave up. I bravely asked who was next, and then the Doc apparently gave the order that I really didn't need
an IV, I just needed to drink some water.
While I appreciated the end of the poking torture, it seems to me that if I was dehydrated enough that no one could get an IV into my, admittedly difficult on a good day, veins, then perhaps I really did need the IV after all, but I gave up and started chugging water because I am not a medical professional. Honestly, at that point I just wanted a diagnosis and to be reassured that the baby was fine and that my cramping was not the beginning of a miscarriage. Captain stood by my side (or at my feet during some of the IV shenanigans) constantly in tactile contact to make me feel better during the worst of it, and kept reminding me that no matter what happened, if we lost the baby it was not my fault. Which I appreciated.
Also, there was barf bag hand puppet theater when we were in between nurses and doctors.
Anyway, after two and a bit hours, there was a pelvic exam where I was told I might have an infection - I didn't - and then an ultrasound given by a Doctor who couldn't even figure out how to plug the machine in for ten minutes. I am not kidding. Still, squirming baby and a heartbeat so that helped to reassure me. Then we were told to sit and wait for the tests to come back so we could get an antibiotic for the non-existent infection, and then thirty minutes later the discharge nurse popped in to tell me I was pregnant and send me home. I asked about the antibiotic, she confirmed there was no infection (HA, I knew it) and no one had an explanation about the cramping, but I was told to come back if there was bleeding and that was it.
Luckily, the ladies on my Facebook are not as clueless as the ER peeps and several of them recognized the pain as probably round-ligament syndrome. I can live with the annoying pain as long as I know that it's normal to a pregnancy and it's not going to kill the baby or me. Also, a bit of reassurance from the ER would have gone a long way, versus the whole "we don't know, but we don't think it's serious" crap I got.
So, moral of the story, my innards are stretching and OMG it's like my period all over again and I thought I was done with that for nine months and also the base ER is full of the stupids.